Thought for the day
If man follows his conscience, the five elements will be in harmony.
From the book Principle of Becoming God
Vasantha : Swami,
please open the doors of
wisdom.
Swami : Write about Feelings
wisdom.
Vasantha : What
do I know? Swami You tell!
Swami : You start writing, while
writing
you will know.
Vasantha : Swami
is it Feelings wisdom or
Thoughts wisdom?
Swami : Feelings arise first, then
thought.
Contemplating
over this, I remembered some incidents from my early
life. I was very timid in my childhood. I was brought up with a lot of
pampering and was unaware of an outside world. I was afraid of everything. If
anyone died in our small village the funeral drums would play and I would feel
very scared. I was so terrified that I would lock myself in a room. Feelings
then arose in me and I began to wonder, why do people die? Is it possible to
escape from death? My maternal grandmother had a stroke and lay bedridden for
several years. At that time she would read to me from the devotional magazine,
‘Bhaktha Vijayam’ and tell the stories of Andal and Meera. Her suffering in old
age made a deep impression in my tender mind and I used to wonder, “Do all
people suffer like this when they get old?” As I grew, my fear of death and
growing old only increased.
In my young age, I would often go to the
local town, Kalligudi, and see films in a thatch cinema. At that time, a
thought came to me that the only way to escape old age and remain young was to
become a cinema star! When I realized that even cinema stars die, I began to
think of new ways to overcome death and old age. I remembered the story of the
eternally young Markendeya and felt that if I too could get a boon from God, I
would remain forever young like him. I discovered the only way to escape death
was through the path of devotion to God.
How can we overcome death? Due to my fear
of death, the thought that I should not die became very strong. I was afraid to
see people dying. I used to think why do people have to die? Will my body also
die one day? Then the thought arose that I should escape death.
First arose the feeling of fear, from
this feeling a thought was born. With the strengthening of these thoughts, many
ideas formed in my mind. ‘Should I become a movie star? They always look young
and beautiful. But alas! They also become old and die!’
I began to contemplate, ‘What is the
solution?’ Of all the stories that my grandmother read to me, the life of Andal
and Meera fascinated me the most. Hearing these stories the wisdom came to me
that I should attain Krishna like them. Like
Andal I wanted to attain the Lord along with the body; the wisdom arose that
this alone is the right path. All other paths gave only temporary solutions.
The wisdom dawned that if I do not want this body to perish, then attaining God
with the physical body is the only way. Thus my prayers were set on this path.
First to arise are feelings, then
thoughts, and finally through discrimination wisdom dawns. This wisdom must be
put into action. I put the wisdom I gained into practice. All are afraid of
death; it is a common feeling. This fear is present from a worm to every living
form in creation. Why does this fear arise? Body attachment alone is the cause.
If we remove this attachment, we become free from fear. Attachment to the body
is the cause for birth and it also gives the desire for worldly relationships.
Attachment to the body changes into
attachment to relatives. How many attachments are
there: my wife, my husband, my children, my money, my job, etc. Caught in these
attachments, we get trapped in the cycle of birth and death.
Who is related to whom? Where were these
relatives before our birth and where are they after death? We must contemplate
on this and understand fully what is true and permanent. God alone is permanent
and true; all else is perishable. The wisdom that God alone is eternal must
arise in us.
When I was young I had a very stubborn
nature; once I decided I wanted something I would not rest until I got it. I
was the only child born into a very wealthy family, where we had many servants.
I lost my mother at a very young age and was brought up completely shielded
from the outside world. At that time I was very fond of dolls and if I had my
heart set on a particular doll, my father and grandmother would immediately
have to send Uncle ‘Agent Thatha’ to Madurai to purchase it. As we lived in a
remote village everything had to be brought from Madurai. The train was the only transport as
there were no buses. First though, we had to get from our remote village to
Kalligudi and then from there take the train to Madurai. Up until the time the doll arrived,
I would neither eat nor speak and cried continuously. My nature was such that I
would not sit quietly until I got what I wanted.
I turned this stubborn nature towards
God; I felt I must see God here itself right now. I
felt I must talk with Him, live with Him, marry Him. Due to my
persistant nature, I did continous sadhana and had many experiences. Like
Andal, I wanted the body to become an offering to the Lord. I prayed that my
body should not fall on the ground. I performed intense penance, purified the
physical body and offered this to Sri Sathya Sai Baba, who accepted my
offering.
